Farm Reality Meets Yuppieville Hope

Saw this ad posted today on craigslist:

"So, last night I'm on my usual walk home though east vancouver and I hear some rustling in the bushes. I look down and there is the most miserable looking little chicken I've ever seen. The warehouse at the corner of Commercial and Hastings is some kind of chicken rendering plant. Anyways, I manage to catch the chicken, which is not an easy thing to do, and bring him home. God knows what he ate off the ground or experienced while running around east van. So there is a dirty and tattered (but otherwise healthy) little chicken in my bathroom, I can hear him chirping away as I type this. He has water, some torn up newspapers and some whole grains to eat. Oh, and we put the lava lamp in there in case he got cold. Willing to give this chicken to someone who will take care of him and NOT eat him. He must be one smart chicken to escape from the death factory and then I carried his filthy ass all the way home. This chicken has earned his retirement. I'd take care of him but we have a large cat and no real yard. If possible please provide picture of Mr. Chickens new home or field. Proof that you will not eat him would help too.
Thank-you
Adam
P.S. Please don't microwave plastic"

The bit about the lava lamp makes me like Adam in spite of his vegetarianism. But what's wrong with microwaving plastic?