Wishlist

I want to stop thinking, and I want to stop trying not to think. I want to start really praying again. I want to stop being afraid of what is or is not to come, and I want to stop caring about what's in the past. I want to work so many hours in the week that the decision as to what is right or wrong is out of my hands - so I don't have to worry about running from my thoughts or not, so I don't have time to think between when I get home from my second shift and when I fall asleep. I want to stop being a coward. I want God to show me the way.