Dec. 31 [Edited version]

I haven't made any New Year's resolutions, folks. I've made one resolution, but it's more of a rest-of-my-life thing, and I made it about 3 weeks ago. It is, "I am never getting married." This is not a cry of despair, folks; this is a conscious decision spurred on by observation of husbands and wives of my acquaintance, these observations leading to the mental remark, "I am neverthef*** getting married." It is quite possible that I will change my mind at some point, but for the moment, Hell No.
So instead of listing off a lot of New Year's Resolutions that I would, as with last year's, break from the get-go, I am going to type up a list of things I fantasize about.
Here goes:
1) Getting in a car (one that runs well) and driving away, not to return for months and months. As it is winter right now, I would first explore the warmer regions of this great continent, stopping at such places as Salt Lake City and some of the farther-out cities of Utah; Tombstone, AZ; the Carlsbad Caverns; and let's not forget a stay at the Amargosa Opera House and Hotel near Death Valley. Once warmer weather set in, I would head northeast to see New England, the countryside of New York, do a little hiking in the Adirondacks, and cross the line again to visit Gaspe, Quebec, and all the northeastern provinces. This fantasy also involves the possession of sufficient funds for such a jaunt.
2) [Bitter rant deleted]
3) Having my very own cozy little house where I can sleep and read and play music and cook whatever I want to and People Will Leave Me Alone.
4) Curing my 14-year-old brother of babytalk. That is, making him change from "Dis is what faver said about de fing wif de cafflicks" to This is what Father said..." You get the idea. Gosh it's annoying. You're fourteen, for f***'s sake!!!
5) [Bitter rant deleted]
6) Not being such a morose b****. Instead, having a sunny (but not vapid, folks, vapid is right out) disposition, an increase in personal practice of virtue of charity, a job I like, losing the potty mouth, and having enough money to have my own car, make my student loan payments, move out of the house, and occasionally buy a pair of shoes from a store that is not called PayLess.
7) World Peace.

Alrighty. Mom is summoning me to go watch little bro and Dad play chess. We are having a rocking NY's celebration tonight, I can tell you...

Will probably delete this tomorrow.
Good night!